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Autism and the Absent Mommy October 25, 2008

Posted by hopeauthority in Autism, Children, Family, Parenting, special needs.
Tags: , , , ,

As much as I claim to to be the woman in the commercial yelling, “Calgon, take me away!”, and there’s many days I feel like I will have a breakdown if I don’t get away from the craziness, the truth is that I hate to go away from my kids.

But sometimes, it’s necessary.

This weekend I will be away from them from pre-dawn on Saturday til just before bedtime on Sunday. I am attending a writer’s seminar in a neighboring state. I just found out this week that one of the presenters… who happens to be not only famous, but an inexplicably generous soul…said I could attend as his guest!  It was an offer I’d be a fool to pass up.

But there is a high price to pay, after all…

All the shopping, baking, and cooking in advance so ‘C’ won’t starve in my absence…all the laundry and schedule adjustments. Getting coverage for rides to this or that, since both kids have conflicting activities on Saturday. Don’t get me wrong, daddy is good with the kids… But he’s no mommy.

And no matter how well I prepare things, there are two givens:

One is that my absence will cause ‘C’ to be “off”, which will be stressful on all of them.

And two is that no matter how much I am loving this seminar and the fact that I will get to sleep alone in peace in a hotel… I will feel a ton of guilt (that’s just me!) and I will probably not sleep anyway. 

Anyone have an opinion on whether it is okay to go away overnight without your autistic child? When is it okay to put them through the added stress that your absence causes? Just for work, vacation, emergencies?

I’m hoping to advance my at-home writing career, so I can continue to provide both children with what they need.

It sounds good on paper. But why do I feel so sad?



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