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In My Father’s Eyes… December 11, 2008

Posted by hopeauthority in Autism, Children, Parenting, special needs.
Tags: ,

Not my typical post today. Today would have been my dad’s 74th birthday.

 In the past 12 years without him, my life has been completely transformed. The most noteworthy change being that the grandchildren he never got to see were finally born to his only child.

It wasn’t a “Leave it to Beaver” kind of house. In fact, my life was more like a made for TV movie plot. But, no one’s perfect and I’ll spare the gory details. He made some bad choices, but believed they were in my best interest. And he adored his little girl.

And because he was my dad…he was perfect in my eyes.

Any unresolved feelings toward my dad melted away the day my son was born. On the very day.  It was like an awakening. Like the slate was wiped clean. Some kind of strange and awesome payback or bonus to make up for anything I could ever have thought of holding against him.

My son was a gift. A gift from my dad. No doubt about it.

He looks like my dad…twinkling green eyes and a devilish grin. Fair-skinned and fair-haired recessive Irish traits emerged over competing Italian darker ones. Slim and tall in a family of stocky and shorter men. An athlete with a special talent for basketball, like his grandpa. A wicked sense of humor that refused for even one minute to be repressed by autism. Smart as a whip.

Happy Birthday in Heaven, Dad. Thanks for sending a piece of yourself down here for me to love each day.



1. rhemashope - December 11, 2008

Beautiful post. Happy Birthday to your Dad. It must be a comfort to see your father live on in your son. I love how God does things like that.

2. HeatherPride - December 11, 2008

Oh, so very beautiful! I got a tear in my eye, thinking of your dad in heaven, sending a little version of himself to you. So sweet. Give your son a hug for me.

3. hopeauthority - December 11, 2008

Thanks guys. Should have mentioned that it took us 6 IVF tries (over 7 years) to have our daughter and one more IVF for our son. Such hard-earned prizes, they were.
I was so determined to have a child and was totally happy with our daughter. We said upon going back again, that we’d just try once and if it was meant to be that we have a second child, then it would work that one time. And here we are. With the first boy born in the family in over 25 years on my hubby’s side and in over 40 years on my side. That’s why it felt like a gift from above.

4. goodmum - December 11, 2008

This is beautiful. And wow, your kids really were hard-earned prizes. 🙂

5. acollage - December 12, 2008

Awww, I don’t know a better word to say my first thought at your post. I lost my dad 2.5 years ago, and while his birthday’s months away, it’s still hard. The holidays seem to make it harder, but your story about your son is beautiful. I do believe that while we don’t understand things, so very often, they work out in ways that are miracles later on.

6. hope4mygirl - December 18, 2008

What a beautiful post, I’m in tears. Happy Bday to your Dad and you are so lucky he sent you “C” to love every day!!!! What a beautiful gift from heaven he sent to you!!!

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